I am a horible blogkeeper!

Hello all! I know my blog's practically dead, I am just terrible at maintaining one. But anyhoo, just a short quick entry. You may catch me and the rest of The Dreamers on The Showdown tomorrow night, Thursday 8pm on Channel 5. Do tune in if you can.

Was down at Mediacorp earlier at about 10pm for a radio interview with Justin Ang and Vernon A. on Muttons At Midnight on Perfect 10 98.7 FM. Was plenty fun and laughter throughout. Was put through The Muttons challenge and had to sing a song while being fed mouthfuls of Geylang 'Dao Huay' (Beancurd). For those of you missed it, I think my brother helped record parts of the show. Will try to upload it but keep your fingers crossed because I'll first need to find out how to work the audio on this blog. LOL. :)

I do hope everyone's doing great. I've been going through a major down in my life for the past couple of months so I guess I didn't have the mind to come here and update. Besides it'll be all gloom anyway if I did. Will make the effort to update more! Good night all and God Bless! HUGS!

Channel U's 'U Are The One', The Showdown etc...

Wow it's been such a long time since I posted anything here. A month long hiatus! But here's an update on what's been happening.

I will be guest judging for Channel U's new talent search show 'U Are The One' come Monday 31st March at 8pm. So do tune in if you can. I don't quite know what to expect but am sure as hell going to try to brush up my very rusty Mandarin within these very short few days and hopefully not look like an idiot on screen. It's time to 'jiang hua yu'. *lol*

Check it out here:
http://u.mediacorptv.sg/uaretheone/
http://u.mediacorptv.com/index.htm

Also am half way through filming for The Showdown which is an upcoming show on Channel 5. Kind of like battle of the reality stars or something like that. Shall not reveal too much. I think the air-date will be sometime in May if I am not wrong. The tv teasers and trailers are already out. So do watch out for it. Will post a couple of pictures I took on set real soon so do check back.

Have a bit of good news as well. I recently finished recording a demo for the upcoming National Day song. Yeah I know it's pretty early eh. So anyways, apparently every year a handful of songs are pitched to the ministry and they get to decide which song they'd like to use for the next NDP theme song. And I'm happy to tell that they picked the song I recorded. Apparently they were pretty happy with it and were curious to know who the voice behind the song was. I'm just glad I got to do it, you know, get to sing the Singapore song and all the feelings of patriotism that come with it. Good thing is I get to keep a copy of the recording for keepsake. They'd probably get a big name like Stephanie Sun or Kit Chan to do it though. I'm not quite anybody...yet...to be optimistic. LOL. Though I was pretty pleased and was good news enough to make my day.

So anyways, life's been alright and I'm trying real hard not to sweat it and just go with the flow. Gonna go get some shut-eye now. Goodnight, sweetest dreams and plenty plenty hugs!

'Bak kuas' and birthday cakes

Happy Chinese New Year to one and all and may you be blessed with good health and many wondrous things! It's been quite some time since my last post, which happens to be of not much substance or interest but mere song lyrics. *lol* Anyhoo, it's been an on-off busy few weeks for me. Been going for meetings, job bookings and some other stuff. Oh and Sennheiser's thinking of taking me up on a endorsement deal with their mics and music equipment. Fingers toes and eyes crossed!

So to make up for posts, here's a clip that pretty much sums up my family's eccentricities at gatherings. Decked out in full-on 'Chai Sen Yeh' gear (Wealth God) is my uncle who gate crashed the party sporting a bagful of ang baos with 4D numbers inside. Everyone received a lucky packet.

I have the coolest family la!

Also this year, my birthday fell on the 3rd day of the Lunar New Year (Feb 9th baby), so it was really great seeing my one big nutty family under one roof again. Mummy, daddy, sisters, brother, aunties, uncles, cousins, boyfriends, ex-boyfriends *lol* all under one roof. So nice. And of course there was merry-making with friends and the special people in my life over the following week. I am so blessed. Not forgetting the bonus that comes with turning a year older: Birthday presents! I ate so much over the New Year that I fell ill with fever, which seems to be a yearly affair. Oh the woes of having great cooks for aunties. Anyhoo, I'm gonna keep this one short. So nighty night all!

What hurts the most....

I can take the rain on the roof of this empty house
That don’t bother me
I can take a few tears now and then and just let them out
I’m not afraid to cry every once in a while
Even though going on with you gone still upsets me
There are days every now and again I pretend I’m ok
But that’s not what gets me

What hurts the most
Was being so close
And having so much to say
And watching you walk away
And never knowing
What could have been
And not seeing that loving you
Is what I was tryin’ to do

It’s hard to deal with the pain of losing you everywhere I go
But I’m doin’ It
It’s hard to force that smile when I see our old friends and I’m alone
Still harder
Getting up, getting dressed, livin’ with this regret
But I know if I could do it over
I would trade give away all the words that I saved in my heart
That I left unspoken

What hurts the most
Is being so close
And having so much to say
And watching you walk away
And never knowing
What could have been
And not seeing that loving you
Is what I was trying to do

Totally feeling this song by Rascal Flatts right now...Somewhat reflects a chapter in my life many moons ago. I know you are resting with the angels S.L. I will always have you tucked away in the corners of my heart...

Let me paint you a picture

Taffy and Phoebe sitting about the X'mas tree.

You see those two adorable fur balls? They own me. Anyhoo, I think the art fart bug has bitten me again. The last time it bit me I got all revved up and went shopping for art materials, paint and all that jazz. And then....nothing. What an anti-climax. Thought I'd actually get all dirty with paint all over my hands hunching over the easel fervently working a piece of art. I don't have an easel though, been meaning to get one since I last threw away my old one. I guess now it's pretty apparent, the procrastinator in me.

BUT! I did go shopping for frames. So that's a start right? I mean I was like taking note of the measurements so I can finally start working on a few ideas I have in my mind. Yes I do paint in my free time or when I feel inspired. Or, at times like this when the art bug comes abuzzing at my ear.

Among the plethora of ideas I've swept away into the corners of my mind, am thinking of doing a series of three paintings for mummy. Perhaps one of a plum blossom, duckweed and lotus flower. Since mummy loves plants, flowers, gardening and all that. Us three sisters' Mandarin names actually translate into those three plants. Me the plum blossom, Sandra the lotus flower, and Shereen the duckweed. So I thought it would be something nice for her to have. *smiles sheepishly*

Series of 3.
Mix media - Acrylic, gauche, gold pen, sequins on brown paper.

Maybe I should (one very fine day *lol*) sieve through the archive of artsy stuff I've done and put a couple up of them here. Some from many years back. Sounds like a plan. Here's one series from I think five years ago for a start. :)

The Drama Queen in me

I just have to get it out and scream...

At exactly the same day next week,
I CANNOT BELIEVE I'M GOING TO BE ONE YEAR CLOSER TO DYING !"

Not even sure if that even makes sense. I also can't believe that when I was type-screaming, I actually hit the keys on the keyboard pretty hard one by one in some sort of robotic sequence...I guess this is what screaming out loud on a blog is like.

Just being dramatic. In a dramatic mood today.

"Star light star bright, first star I see tonight"

"Wish I may, wish I might, have the wish I wish tonight."

I was putting away gifts I received throughout the festive season of Christmas. Yes I do know it is much overdue. Just that there was a pile of opened pressies sitting in the corner of my room screaming "PUT US AWAY WOMAN!" Procrastinator number one I tell you.

By the way, I received a Wishbone necklace as a gift from a dear friend of mine for Christmas. Which kind of explains the title in a way and the rest of the entry. I really love it. Here's why.

(My dear and cherished friends and loved ones reading this please do not pick a bone {no pun intended} and misconstrue my intent to speak about this particular gift. I love you all the same, gifts included, and I know they all come from the deepest cushiest crevice of your big big heart. You know how random I can be so this is just me being whimsically random..whatever that means)

My little silver reminder and lucky charm!

So yes, back. Not just because it's pretty or the fact that I've been eyeing it on RedEnvelope.com for a while now. Well, I'm not going to lie and say it's not pretty la. It is indeed. But more so because of the meaning it holds for me.

When I was younger, mummy and daddy used to buy this salt-baked chicken (yummy!), a loaf of Gardenia bread and canned drinks. Then us the Simon family used to head down to MacRitchie Reservoir occasionally for picnics, usually on Sundays because every Sunday was 'family day' back then. We'd pick a spot and begin attacking the chicken with our fingers and chowing it down. Never wash hands....Eeeyer. Yes, just like that, on some grassy knoll getting our little fingers and greedy mouths all greased up. But the highlight of tearing the delicious chicken apart and stuffing our faces, is the moment the 'wishbone' starts to peek out from beneath the mess of flesh under our watchful eyes. Since there were 3 of us sisters then (before my brother Kevin was born), and only 2 spots to have a go at the wishbone, we usually gave up our spot if we were feeling like good little children, if not then fight for it la. So as you all probably already know, two people make a wish and break apart a wishbone and the one that gets the bigger half gets their wish fulfilled.

You: "What? You mean you silly children and gazillions of silly adults out there in the world actually believe that wishing on the bigger half of some bird's fused clavicle bone resembling the letter 'Y' actually works? Rubbish..." Well we did, and to this day I still do.

Goodbye salt-baked chickens, Hello wishes in waiting.
Had us poor children only known...

I guess what I'm trying to get at, is that every time I see a wishbone, it transports me back to those days with my sisters, daddy and mummy sitting down sharing a simple meal together... That memory and the connotations the wishbone carries make it special to me. It is mostly the child in me that believes in wishes being granted and dreams becoming reality. And at this point of my almost-adult-life, after experiencing and witnessing not just my own but other's pain, helplessness, injustice, disappointments, among many other awful things, it is so important to be reminded of hope and possibility. I hope the child in me never dies.

"Blood-duh! Not funneeee!"

This really made my day. Was a pretty humdrum type of day until I got this in my inbox. I think the story goes that this little boy had accidentally head butted and bloodied his baby brother's lip while playing. This boy sure is seeing red! I love how he gets majorly pissed at his Daddy for taking the matter lightly. Damn cute la!

I so wanna hug him and pinch his cheeks!!! Especially when he pokes his cheek to tell Daddy, "Derrr" ("there").

Soul searching on a rainy day...

It's been pouring intermittently between days. Am starting to wonder if the weather's working it's enigma on me lately. I love rainy days. You know, the smell of fresh rain, the grey skies, the first pitter-patter against the window pane, then everything around outside goes fuzzy...Like the world's going through some sort of spiritual cleansing. I've realised recently that I've stopped doing those things. Noticing that is. You know alot of us get totally caught up in a myriad of emotions we forget what helps take away the hitches in our lives (like the natural phenomenon such as rain or whatever it may be for you), if even for a few seconds.

So yes, 'soul searching'. If you try to be funny (which I am attempting to be) you could actually force some sort of double meaning out of it: A time to contemplate and reflect on past present behaviours and desires, or finding a Soulmate. The term as such a mystical affinity to it! Eeeeyer....

So even if you think you've found the ultimate half of your soul, surely the magic's going to dwindle as years crawl by? It's feeling like Christmas is magical as a child, and then finding out that there isn't a Santa. So, if keeping the magic alive is to carry on with the pretence that Santa's (let's use 'Santa' to replace 'magic' for a bit here *lol*) alive and kicking in the deep crevices of an iceberg in an igloo sipping hot cocoa with his elves in the Northpole, surely it MUST be denial? Maybe. But maybe not. Perhaps it's about having hope and celebrating it. OR, it's probably not about finding that perfect someone, but finding perfection in that someone? Tough right. But not impossible I guess. People say that you'll just know.

Clueless person: "How do you like, you know...KNOW?"
Person who knows: "Well, I guess you know....You'll just KNOW."

Like WOW that really helps eh. Tough! Starting to feel like this entry belongs on an episode of Oprah. *lol*

So drabby la my mood is. Anyway there's 'stuff' going on in my life at the moment that's difficult to discuss so openly. All I know is, that it is all in this good ol' head of mine. Just have to remind myself that it's just 'stuff' and I shouldn't sweat it too much. Whatever it is can't be huge compared to what the rest of the world is going through. Using that analogy somehow helps get me through whenever I feel really lousy about something. That, or a tub of Ben & Jerry's Cherry Garcia!

Ok eeeeeenufff of whining. Time to do some actual soul searching, count my many many blessings in life which I should be so thankful for (and I truly am), pull the curtains apart and watch the rain slowly wash over the world. Shall leave you with my quote of the week, "Shoot for the moon. Even if you miss, you'll land amongst the stars."

Embracing the new year with thanks

Performing with Robert Sunga at Countdown 2008, Vivo City.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dZIgSJvjQAE

Here are some shots of the solo pre-show performances that night, googled and found on blog sites. :)

Having a talk on stage with hottie Max Loong. Blur pic...pity pity.

Happy 2008 one and all! Hope you all had a merry merry one. I don't quite believe in making resolutions, because there are just too many things I feel I need to do or improve. So my list would be extremely long. But one thing I do hope for me and for everyone else, is that we be happier and content with what we already have in our lives at present. You know, the simple things we greedy humans often overlook. Family is important, and so I really do hope to make more time for them.

So thank you mummy, daddy, my two beautiful sisters and my angel of a brother. Thank you mummy and daddy for always letting me know that I am loved and special, for being my silent pillars of strength, for allowing me to make mistakes and loving me the same still, for worrying about whether I've had enough to eat or sleep and for being supportive of whatever it is I choose to do. I hope that so far, I've made you both proud enough. Thank you Reen and Dra for teaching me what sisters do for each other, for laughing and crying with me, for always reminding me that God is with me in whatever I do, for being my big sisters even though I am older but not necessarily wiser, for loving me as I am faults and all. Kevin boy, I have always believed that you are our angel sent from above to teach our family Life's lessons; you carry something within you that constantly reminds me that life is precious and should be treasured, you've taught me that to be able to wake up everyday is a miracle in itself; and thank you for laughing with me on the silliest things and singing your Hokkien songs. LOL. I hope to be a better daughter and sister. I love you all greatly and pray that God keeps you safe and in his arms throughout 2008.

Also like to say how grateful I am to all who have been cardinal in my adventure (I like to call it that LOL) so far since Live The Dream. Thank you for showing me so much support and for your endless encouragement. God bless and hugs all round!

I want to do more in 2008, so I hope more doors will open with a little bit of luck being at the right place at the right time.

I just had a 'light bulb' moment. *ting!*

Instead of making resolutions which I am terrible at even remembering or keeping, I shall come up with a list of things I wish to attempt this year perhaps, or hope to do la. I once read somewhere that it is good to make and keep a To-Do Life List, and then set about doing them one by one. I've already started my list early last year and managed to cross off a couple of them. Think it would be nice to share it with everyone here.

Tomorrow, I have got to remember to pick up my jacket which I left behind at the hairdresser's last week! And and and...am happy that I'm going to meet my 'breast' friend for dinner tomorrow (actually later today...) and dessert and exchange gifts!! Yes we're still in time! It is still Christmas! I hope she likes what I got for her. LOL.

Till then, it's getting late and I should be in bed all warm and snuggled with my 2 kitties which I shall post pictures of soon. Sweetest dreams one and all!